Palutena's Regurging Blooper
by Kaabisteru
Summary: Mario brings in Colress to reveal his newest, groundbreaking discovery exclusively for all Pokemon Trainers and many more during his show. However, Pit and Palutena come for dinner due latter abominably messing it up in their home. As Peach's cooking crew goes to look for a very foreign ingredient, Palutena unexpectedly cooks up another disaster... (NC EP1)


**~ Nintendo Club ~**

**Episode -1-**

**- Palutena's Regurging Blooper -  
**

* * *

**1- Breaking the Limits**

* * *

"_Totaling up..._

_Aaaand- we have 149 guests in!" _

_"That's amazing Joe, how did you calculate that much so quickly?"_

_"Gee, I dunno- Perhaps this counter has something to do with it?"_

_"You're always carrying some invention with you, aren't you?_"

The guests had partially flooded in the main hall now. The way they chatted was very quiet and sophisticated: in such huge numbers, the way it filled the air was wonderfully uplifting.  
From the nearly empty V.I.P balcony watched the kind-hearted cleaning robot girl _Roll Light_: the ponytailed blonde stood on her "toes" as she struggled a bit to look down at the crowd from its varnished, mahogany front edges.  
Accompanying her was _Knuckle Joe_, getting tired of eyeing the stage lights, which were being awkwardly adjusted by _Slippy Toad_, Fox McCloud's froggy friend: not too long before he'd get tangled in the numerous wires inside the tech room above them.

Climbing up the wall before her a bit with her robotic feet, Roll finally got a good grip and enough height to see over the edge. Her eyes beamed in admiration as she saw the beautiful layout of the main hall: the white and yellow color scheme gave it a royal appearance, along with the well-lighted corridors on the second floor. The central area was really huge as well, seemingly reserved for things that needed extra space.

Seeing those guests getting seated in the eight dining levels was an elating sight: so much so that she hadn't noticed the hot-blooded martial artist boy now standing on the edge daringly. Her eyes went wide.  
"Joe, what are you doing?!" she asked in a rather worried tone. Joe just did his signature nose wiping as a response.  
"Gettin' bored of waiting here, that geezer should have already come out and gotten started with this show..." said Joe grumpily. I heard they're serving something good today."  
"_Didn't know you were such a glutton…_"  
"Naah, I'm just hungry after all the sparring with Mac tod**- WOAH-_OH_-**!"

Roll watched as Joe slipped and disappeared from her sight, below the balcony's edge.

"**No-**!"

The blonde didn't waste any time. She ran directly to the edge and hopped up to see over: only to be surprised to see Joe struggling to get back up by frantically jumping in midair and reaching to catch one of the lamps sticking out from the wall.

_Both sighed a deep breath of relief._

* * *

_"Ah! __Mint's **frisbee**_! _I'm so sorry! _I didn't really meant to throw it _that _powerfully...I'm just so versed with using objects like that when fighting..."  
"You mean _chakrams_? I already forgot about you telling about them... _Don't worry; I'm sure we'll find it tomorrow."  
"O-of course! I-I hope so too...  
_

_Colette Brunel_ was now conversing with_ Pastel Annamon_, a new friend she had made whilst vacationing in the resort. Colette, along with her close friends, had travelled to Wuhu Island by invitation of the famous Mario Brothers to celebrate their 10nth anniversary of their cult RPG work.  
Even then, the 3-day vacation in this island blew her mind, even not partaking on much activities: the grassy landscapes and hills were absolutely dreamy to lie down and soak under the bright sun, meanwhile watching her friends waving at each other as they'd run on their ways to each's favorite hobbies.  
Right now both had managed to reunite with their respective friends, who were all given seats on the middle dining level near the center. Lloyd and Raine were now getting everyone's tickets stamped by one of the Toads in order to get a permit to move up the stairs.  
"_So our seats are up here?"  
__"Yes. Seeing how broad the dining area is, it should have seats for all of us."__  
__"Look, there seem to be extra places for our companions as well!_"_  
_

Climbing the red staircase, a _Waiter Dee_ (wearing a black bowtie and white collar) opened the little doorway for them and bowed as it gestured for them to go in. Colette couldn't help patting the little creature while calling it adorable: meanwhile Raine snickered in amusement.  
"How cute." she said caustically. Colette soon nodded in agreement, wondering why her teacher had never openly stated she had a thing for cute creatures before. Raine promptly asked her to keep on moving.

Three tables stood in the firmly fenced square-shaped dining area, in which all the Heroes of Regeneration, dressed in their formal clothes, were given their respective seats: the central table being the most broad , with one on each side to seat the additional guests, the three Twinbee Pilots and their pigtailed close friend. Lloyd directed the blue-clad pilot along with his girlfriend, _Light _and _Madoka _to their seats.  
_"Here you are, Light. Enjoy your dinner!"  
__"Thanks. "__  
_

After the moment in which Lloyd came back, all sat down and turned to see the empty stage, lights swaying here and there on the curtains.  
"Pretty interesting folk... they said they come from _Konami_'s "_Golden Age of Shooting._" mentioned Regal. Genis put down the menu while raising his eyebrows.  
"Oh, that one? I read about it being dead a long time ago..." he recalled. "I guess it had something to do with the change of preferences on in the marketing audience..."  
"Endearing looking girls with exaggerated characteristics, fighting against the Bullet Rain..." said Presea., "I'm... not keen on that." she added in a deadpan tone.  
"Hm? What would you prefer then, Presea?" asked Genis, thinking this could be a nice opportunity to hear an opinion from her.  
"Actual hot-blooded, exciting action and an engaging plot..." the lumberjack replied. "_Mecha figurines can come later..._"

For a while they all stared at her, boiling down her opinion in their minds. They were suddenly interrupted by Madoka who sneezed loudly for some reason.  
"I still wonder where Kratos and Yuan went to, didn't they mean to join us?" wondered Lloyd.  
"They told me today that they'd pass on coming for this occasion." replied Raine. "They had some other plans."  
"_What a boring bunch..._ I already thought this place looked quite magnificent, but now things are looking even more promising!" remarked Zelos in an interested tone. "Besides, we got some cute hunnies to share the dinner with, thanks to our precious angel Colette~"  
"_I'm still here, you know._" Sheena pointed out while playing with a fork in boredom.

"_Hey guys, look!_"

Suddenly Colette pointed at the stage- more specifically to its giant red lights had gathered together at their center and formed what looked like a mushroom-shaped emblem.  
"Yep, there we go. It's going to start now." Zelos predicted. All looked as the hall's lamps started to dim and the stage lit up brightly.

First, a sole spotlight moved to the center of the stage, where a lone Question Block had appeared. The block wriggled and jumped little, seemingly holding something inside that was trying to wiggle out.

With a loud pop with some glitter and confetti, the flap of the block flung open as a big monitor launched out and flipped over multiple times before stopping to float in midair. Soon a single robotic arm came out from below it and the monitor booted up to reveal a simple face. The arm then put a simple hat upon the monitor and adjusted a red bow below the screen.

"_And now welcoming our-_" it said in a robotic voice, but suddenly stopped and made a startled expression as if realizing something was wrong.

The robot reached its arm behind the monitor and turned something, making a loud click. After that it spoke again, this time in a mellower, feminine voice.

"_And now, please welcome our beloved host of Lucky Heavens Super Show..._" she said with her voice building up with excitement,

"**It's ****Mario****, _Marioooohhh_!**"

During the gleeful announcement, a green warp pipe had sprouted up on the left side of the stage and shot out the superstar plumber with a bang. After spinning on the air acrobatically, Mario landed on his feet and waved at the audience with a bright grin.

"_Hello everybodyy-a!_" he greeted excitedly, "_Its-a-me, **Mario**, bringing you yet another **super-duper** **show **to enjoy!_"

The red plumber netted joyous applause from the crowd: just the signal he needed to go into his announcement. He promptly moved the mike near his mouth.  
"_You might even say it will be **Mega-SuperDuper-a!**_" he belted out. "_In any case, this next announcement will surely **rock **certain trainers' cores tonight!_"

Behind the opening curtains was Rock "Megaman" Light, who grinned sheepishly in slight chagrin. Luigi patted him in the back apologetically.  
"_Along with this-a, we have a-guest today to celebrate the line of unique works from one of Nintendo's most acclaimed subsidiaries-a!_" the plumber announced with glee, "_And of course-a, we'll move straight to today's Royal Dinner by Princess Peach and her Kitchen Crew..._". Saying that made Mario slurp briefly.  
The lights went to the left side of the stage revealing a small cafe-like section where Peach and crew a crew of chefs (_"Cooking" Mama, Cilan, Chef Kawasaki and Cut Man_) waved generously from. Everyone took a breath of anticipation.

Still far above in the balcony were Joe and Roll, the former of whom grinned in excitement for the announcement. Still, he suddenly frowned, seeming impatient while looking at his wrist.  
"_Where are those guys?_ I hope they don't miss her appearance on stage tonight..." he grumbled.  
"Oh? What guys?" Roll said, but she soon heard the doorknob turn and click from the door behind them. From there came a young woman, wearing a rather plain but pretty goldenrod dress and with her leaf-green hair in a ponytail.  
"_Already here, Joe?_" she said in a sophisticated tone- "I was wondering where our seats were tonight."  
"You took long enough, Lyn... but anyways, make yourselves at home." replied Joe, swiping his nose again.  
Roll witnessed some quirky folk follow after her, including but not limited to a handsome blonde swordsman, a bespectacled prodigy clad in green, a cute Labrador Retriever puppy dog and a sentient waddling star who tripped halfway up when trying to get on one of the seats.

Back at the stage, Mario glanced quickly to the right to check the off-stage corridor for his brother: and there he was, doing a gesture signifying that the show's next guest was coming up. Taking a step forward, he turned to the audience enthusiastically.  
"Now starts the first event of today's show! Anyway, _before we roll out-a_," said Mario, "**_Monita_**_, would you please_?"

Answering his call, the robot from before floated over next to him and started speaking.  
"_Ahem, today's event might be enough to blow your minds majorly! This following exhibition coincides with a new discovery that unfolded in the faraway region of **Kalos**. _

_Now, exclusively for this show, we shall reveal this amazing discovery for you trainers out there, courtesy of a certain well-known and ambitious Pokemon Researcher!_"

"Exactly! Now, please welcome…" said Mario as drums rolled,

"_Professor Colress Achroma!_"

A few gasps went in the air from random parts of the audience. The lights went to the right, following the mentioned researcher, who was wearing his signature lab coat and holding a folded white tablet. As he turned mysteriously to the audience, many raised their eyebrows, perplexed at his rather strange blue hair which came from the side of his forehead and curled around his head.

Meanwhile the Pokemon trainers had already started to debate warily and in confusion: what would the former criminal Colress do in here in front of them, and why was he even allowed to take part in this event? It felt pretty absurd, even though he had not appeared in the open for a year.  
"Hey Mario, are you bringing that crazy professor here?!" said Youngster Joey while raising his fist. Many types of trainers, (from veterans to bikers) joined him in throwing resentful judgments and scowling at the researcher.  
Meanwhile Juniper had already advised the trainer Hilbert "Black" to prepare himself for the worst.  
_"If this is yet another liberation ambush and Team Plasma is being revived once again..._" she whispered. The boy nodded back and reached to his waist, getting ready.

Mario had already noticed the crowd getting rather worked up in their discussion.  
"_Mamma-mia..._ _I guess Luigi wasn't joking..."_ he thought uneasily. He turned to Colress and was about to say something, but the scientist just raised his open palm reassuringly. He seemed to have been prepared for this kind of reaction.

"Heed my words trainers... for I come in name of _science_, not _violence_." he stated.

Colress coughed lightly, and soon enough, everyone indeed quieted down. Just then he chuckled a bit after realizing what he just said.  
"Well that sounded rather old-fashioned... Pardon me. Nevertheless, I should declare once again that Team Plasma has been disbanded a long time ago. I have no desire to _use or associate their evil intentions with my research._"

The scientist raised his head and smiled enigmatically.  
"Speaking of my research, might some of you know that it was about bringing out the true power... the true potential of your Pokemon?"

He looked all over the crowd, realizing that most of the trainers were now all ears. He continued with enthusiasm.  
"I'm proud to announce that_ I have finally found the key to it!_ During my trip to Kalos to research the foundations of Pokemon's energy and genes, I stumbled on certain landmarks that bore abnormal amounts power. From closer inspection, I discovered that they used to be sanctuaries built as training grounds where a Pokemon and his trainer's minds were made to unite into one... drastically increasing their prowess and bringing out each other's true potential!"

Now gasps reeled throughout the hall. The audience was really getting interested.  
"Furthermore, I found these all to be linked to certain stones I had found throughout Kalos, which I hypothesize are where the combined power of the trainer and his Pokemon would be kept in. I believe they're the key to unlocking these ancient methods of bringing out a Pokemon's true potential... naturally, I then settled in Kalos to research these stones and landmarks, to find more about the origins of these powers and rituals."

Suddenly Hilbert raised his arm.  
"So how are we sure you're not up to anything evil again? I heard that you almost _destroyed_ Unova when I was gone!" he pointed out. Crowded whispers of agreement followed.

Colress just chuckled audaciously, but couldn't help feeling a little malcontent that people were still negatively judging him. He had indeed gone on another path with his research after atoning for his radical devotion to science, which once threatened the region of Unova gravely.  
Maybe it didn't matter... these folk would still keep on reminding of his former mania and crimes.

But before he could think any further, someone far behind the trainers suddenly stood up. It was a man with short, dark violet hair, wearing a shaman's robe. Adjusting a lone monocle on his left eye, he showed a cultured yet rather serious frown as he spoke up.

"_I don't wish to interrupt you all here, but I find all the animosity thrown on this man to be a little too harsh. This man clearly has a life's ambition, and unlike what you people think, it isn't seeking power and destruction. It's to gain knowledge. And personally, I find it deeply admirable._"

Another man with a long, gray hair now tugged on the shaman's sleeve and asked him to sit down before he got too carried away. But the man speaking, named _Canas_, just shook his head suavely at _Pent_ and continued anyway.  
"_Some might know me around here and be aware that I do associate myself with elderly magic, which is more well-known as "dark magic"... but even so, I only wish to seek knowledge… to discover and enlighten myself and know more about my world.  
_  
_The nature of this pursuit __differentiates itself from matters associated with questions of morality... in other words,__ I believe that knowledge shouldn't be associated with good or evil... it just clearly isn't linked to either of them. That's the beauty of it... the even line we can walk through the gray that is in between black and white, if you catch my meaning?_

_Mind you, I'm clearly aware that perhaps, he has done evil deeds before... But I also can't deny that after looking into his eyes, they do show me signs of an amendment made long ago. _  
_This man... he clearly desires redemption for his deeds and wishes to make up for them while still keeping true to his heart's devotion. Without that devotion, perhaps he wouldn't even be here with us, to show us something marvelous soon enough. So I humbly request for you all to show some humanity towards him._

_I hope I didn't talk too much... now excuse me..."_

But as he was about to sit down, he noticed how Colress waved his hand, as if to ask him not to sit quite yet.

"_I'm… thank you... comrade._ _I genuinely appreciate your words._" he smiled. Canas just nodded back in a refined manner.

"_My heartfelt __pleasure, Doctor Achroma__._"

By now Mario had actually hopped in front of Colress, signifying for the unseen staff to prevent the momentum of the event from halting.  
"Those were some deep words from our marvelous audience-a! But the show must keep on-a-going!" he stated emphatically. "I hope the trainers feel more positive and are looking forward to hearing about Colress's super-duper discovery!"  
"Ah, yes Mr. Mario! We shall begin right away!" Colress added eagerly.

Soon the curtains opened up, which showed a giant monitor now being lowered down from above the stage. The audience watched some windows open up, revealing the several Pokemon that were portrayed on them. These were _Lucario, Blaziken, Ampharos, Absol and Mawile._

"Now, if any of you in the audience has any of the following Pokemon... I'd like you to volunteer to bring it up here." The scientist requested.

For some time the audience waited, hesitant to speak up. However, one boy, who was actually pretty interested on Colress's exciting sounding story, wanted to try unlocking his partner's potential straight away. Motivating himself with a quick stretch of his bandanna (along with the loud snap that followed when he let go), he raised his hand far up.  
"**Heeey**! I'd like to volunteer!" the boy called out. One of the lights directed itself on him as he jumped out from his seat, zipped across the pathway, and hopped on the stage. To many people's marvel they saw a Lucario follow him with the same upbeat spirit.  
"_Call me **Cameron**!_" he introduced himself while giving the audience a huge thumbs up. Mario suddenly noticed he was wearing an orange T-shirt and blue shorts, which perplexed him.  
"_Um, kiddo..._ did you forget to put on formal clothes before coming to watch this show-a?" he pointed out while putting his hand on Cameron's shoulder. "It's the convention in here-a."

Cameron was clearly taken aback: he stood there with a shocked expression that didn't hide the blush creeping across his cheeks. Meanwhile the audience just tittered as they watched him fidgeting and stuttering something. Cameron's Lucario just threw his paw across his face in annoyed shame.  
"Stepping so proudly on the stage like _that_... Emil would be **proud**!" Lloyd joked.

Cameron apologized briefly, but didn't want to waste any more time. He asked Colress what he wanted him to do. The scientist couldn't help smiling back pleasantly as a response.  
"I appreciate your immediate willingness to cooperate... So this is your Lucario?"  
"Yep! He's mymain man! "Cameron stated, turning proudly at him. Lucario grunted spiritedly while throwing his arms akimbo.  
"_I see_... hold on a moment." Colress nodded.

Now the blonde scientist dug through his back pockets, until he pulled out what looked like a shining, white stone. It was almost the size of a sweet potato.  
"I shall now present my most recent discovery…" announced Colress."This is a _Mega Stone_."

Mario whistled in glee. All the audience plainly called out "ooh" as they leaned towards the stone.  
Cameron now couldn't keep still as he drew both his fists below his chin while drumming his feet on the floor.  
"_What does it do?! **What does it do?!**_ "he repeated, quivering.  
"Hold still there boy..." said Colress while placing his palm on boy's back to calm him. "Let your Lucario hold it."  
He handed the large stone to the kid, who in turn gave it earnestly to his Aura Pokemon.

For a moment the jackal-like fighter just stood there while staring at the stone in his paws. The crowd was beginning to get confused.  
"Wait for it. It should happen soon." Colress stated convincingly. And it did.

All of a sudden the glow around the stone brightened and sent out rays of light around it. Mario and Colress took a few steps back, as did Cameron, who protected himself from the bright light coming from his partner.  
Still tilting his head away from the flashes, Lucario didn't realize he had actually started to float in midair as some purple orbs of energy were released from the stone. As they started to gather inside him, everyone gasped and pressed themselves into their seats during the following extraordinary and truly phenomenal scene.

As more of the purple energy started to gather inside Lucario, he tensed up and frowned in a slight tingling pain: Lucario now felt his aura energy spinning chaotically inside him. This energy soon formed purple flames that shrouded all around his body: violet rays of light encircled around him until they formed a large glass orb which encased the Aura Pokemon inside.  
Now the main hall trembled as the orb vibrated vigorously, signaling that it would soon break with abnormal amount of energy.

The orb shattered with a loud, earth-shaking boom that was heard throughout the beach and the surrounding areas of Wuhu Island.  
From the broken orb came Lucario, still encased in a white aura. To everyone's huge surprise, they witnessed the Pokemon suddenly transform: Lucario's tail became furrier and puffier, colored with the same cream-color as his torso. The appendages on his head stretched out and became longer, while a new set of spikes emerged behind his existing ones.  
As the purple fire dissolved into the air, there was a glitter as the light disappeared. Lucario floated down gently.

Mouths fell open everywhere. The Aura Pokemon noticed this, and curiously glanced down to observe himself.  
He seemed to still resemble himself, but to Lucario's big astonishment, he had actually become something entirely new. His paws were now clad in red, as were the tips of the newly lengthened appendages on his head. His torso fur had become a bit bigger too, along with gaining more radical striped markings and spikes near both sides of his chest that parted into Lucario's arms.

Soon cheering and stunned remarks broke through the room. Colress laughed out loud proudly.  
"Meet a new type of evolution that will break boundaries_ you never thought your Pokemon could cross!_ I call it **Mega Evolution**!" he declared with open arms. Applauds and astonished cheers continued to go through the room.  
Cameron's heart raced as he stared incredulously at his transformed partner, which grinned at him in excitement. He moved in closer while squeaking almost like a newly-hatched Pachirisu.

"_Ll-l-Lucario..._" he stammered in a shaky voice. His eyes beamed with sheer marvel.

_Boundaries had truly been broken that night._

* * *

**___All characters written above (c) their respectives companies_**

_A/N: When I wrote about Colress, I had to look up again on his portrayal by Nintendo and other media before starting up: Most of the time he was depicted as plain, onesided evil mad scientist due his mania on researching and scientific hunger. I almost felt hesitant to write about him here due this, but then I remembered that post-game in BW2, he's shown to have reformed himself. Tying this to a certain well-known player unit from Fire Emblem 7/Blazing Sword was pleasing experience to write about._

_ I didn't have initial plans to add Colress in this story from the start, but the announcement about Pokemon X & Y's **Megaevolutions** was an astounding reveal and me and certain fans speculating it being fruits of Colress's research, I set out to implement it here. Also I feel that I'm almost jinxing it being based on trainer's and Pokemon's minds becoming one as seen in Pokemon: Origin-trailer. Look for Red holding some stone in 0:57._


End file.
